It’s 6:30 pm. Dinner is done. The kitchen is clean. The kids are finishing homework, watching TV or playing games. Time to sit and be a couch lump until bedtime, right? NO! Now is the time to start cycling the kids through the evening routine and setting yourself up for a restful night and easy morning.
Wait you don’t have an evening routine? Thinking about the chaos of tomorrow morning is something you’d rather avoid? Netflix and a glass of wine sound much better instead? How about we say along with or later rather than instead? Now is the time to make tomorrow easier.
We’re going to build an evening routine that will decrease the craziness of your school mornings. So skip Netflix for now, but pour that glass of wine or make a cup of tea and come along with me.
We need to start your evening routine by determining your hard stops. What are these? Hard stops are milestones and/or the finish line of your routine; the time you want your kids in bed and the lights out. It could also be the time you want yourself in bed with the lights out if you need to get a better handle on your own sleep habits.
Let’s determine those hard stops. What time do your kids need to wake up for school? Subtract 8-10 hours depending on their ages as appropriate. The hard stop for my kids is 8:45 and 9:30 for me. With this schedule my younger kids get 10 hours of sleep and my oldest 9 . This also gives me 45 minutes of kid-free self-care time for my evening skin routine, to get into my pjs, read a book, etc. Then I want to be in my bed, lights out, no devices.
Your children’s ages and activities will make your routine unique but we’re going to work through a basic list for you to add to your routine as needed.
Almost all of us will have some if not most of these as part of our routine:
Showers/baths
PJs
Teeth and Hair
Next day clothes
Weather check
Bags, Instruments and Coats
Lunch (eating from the cafeteria or packing?)
Calendar check
We are going to start by grouping some of these activities: Calendar and weather check go together. What activities do you and your kids have tomorrow? Will the weather be a factor in those activities? If your child has Scouts and a hike is scheduled, being prepared for rain or cold weather will be vital. However indoor basketball practice likely won’t be affected by either condition, you just have to make sure your kid has their sports bag packed. How about you? Do you plan on getting outside tomorrow for a run, a meeting with a client or friend or just getting errands taken care of? Make sure you have a plan for proper clothing and accessories like an umbrella or coat.
Do your kids pack lunch for school? Check the school lunch calendar to see if they will be buying lunch or bringing it. You have that printed out right? (I’ll have another post about staying on top of school calendars and activities soon). If it’s a pack day… ask tonight what they’d like for tomorrow. You can even pre-pack the shelf stable foods like crackers, Jello, granola bars etc. Leave the sandwiches, wraps, soups etc. for the morning. This is also the time to think about breakfast tomorrow. There might not be any prep work to do but you’ll be prepared to start cooking or bring out the cereal boxes while your coffee is brewing instead of trying to figure it out while still in sleep-brain mode.
Now let’s move to the exit plan for tomorrow. Get those book bags packed, shoes corralled and coats hung and ready to go. You’ve already checked the weather so you know if they need boots or sandals, coats or sun screen. Sports bags, instruments and music, homework projects, classroom show and tell items and the like all need gathered and placed in the launching area. These are all activities you should be doing with your kids.. and not for them. The goal being to establish this as a habit they eventually take care of and you simply come behind and double check.
Finally let’s schedule those bath and bedtime routines. If you have more than one child, you’ll need to figure out the best order for them to go through these routines. I have 3 kids. I have my oldest start first. She has long hair that needs extra care and time to dry before bed and she enjoys the longer stretch of uninterrupted time after her shower to chat with her friends on her phone and read books and listen to music. I ask her to prep her morning launch pad items then she takes over the main bathroom. While she is showering, I have my younger two put their launch pad items together and pick out clothing for the next day. My middle child goes next. He is always in and out quickly. Finally, I have my youngest start in a bath as she still likes to play around a bit and finish with a shower so I can help her wash her hair. I get her hair dry and brushed as does her teeth and reads to me.
Now that we know what to do, let’s break those tasks down into times: Showers/baths will take the most time and you need to determine if that is time you will be directly involved in or simply supervising. A 5 year old in the bath will likely be hands on time for you. A 15 year old in the shower is simply giving them a reminder to get started (and get out!!) I give my kids 20 minutes each for showering and time to brush their teeth and other hygiene tasks. So, in my house shower time takes up 1 hour for the evening routine. I want to add 15 minutes to the last child’s routine so she has time to transition to lights out and also add 15 minutes before the first kid starts her shower to go over the calendar and such.
8:45 – 15 minutes for sleep transition = 8:30
8:30 – 1 hour for showers = 7:30 (this is also when you are packing lunches and prepping the launch pad)
7:30 – 15 minutes to go over the calendar and weather review = 7:15
I need to start my evening routine at 7:15 in order to comfortably prepare us all for bed and not have a crazy morning. And that’s it. Tomorrow when we wake up, we’ll eat our breakfast, pack the last items for lunch, put on our clothes and we’re ready for the day. The key to a great morning, is a solid evening routine.
Let me know in the comments what your routine looks like. Do you face unique challenges and have great tips to share on how to overcome them? I’d love to hear from you.